Worth It
by BlondeBombShell2012
Summary: I think about how foolish I was to once think this wasn't worth it, that she wasn't worth it. Of course I know it won't always be rainbows and butterflies with Kate I still can't believe I ever tried to walk away from her. *Possibly complete, depends on u


_My first Castle fic I am dying waiting around for next Monday and it is only Tuesday so I thought why not get all these stories out of my head. Set sometime in the future. Hope everyone enjoys! _

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One of my favorite sides to Kate Beckett is when she is sleeping soundly with nothing on but a sheet. When her face is peaceful and the moon is glistening over her, shines against her skin, and I can smell us on the sheets, in the air, on her.

Tonight I couldn't tear my eyes off her and sleep even if I wanted too. Kate is sleeping next to me, naked, with my silk sheet draped right above her breasts just low enough to see the top of her scar. Her left leg is hiked up and sticking out from the sheet. Her left fingers loosely hold mine and her face is tilted to the right, strands of golden brown falling around her face.

I find Kate Beckett the most extraordinary, mystifying, perfect woman I have ever met and I would never wish harm upon her, in fact the thought causes knots to form in my stomach, but I love when I can see her "battle wounds" as she calls them. My eyes lower resting upon the bruise on her left knee cap from chasing our suspect today and landing on her knee when she jumped that fence. When I can see her bruises and scars and all the stories they tell it just reminds me how precious and grateful I am that she is alive and laying next to me.

To me, they show how strong she is, not how weak. The fact she can take a beating, physically and emotionally, and still get up every morning and put on that badge and gun amazes me. Her battle wounds just remind me how lucky I am to have been fortunate enough to be allowed on this journey with her and how I'll follow her to the ends of the earth to protect her the best I can and to make sure she is safe. I will always do everything in my power to make sure her bruises and scars stay just that because the thought of losing her forever is unbearable.

I find myself starting to panic when just the idea of a life without Beckett starts flashing through my mind and suddenly the urge to wake her up is overwhelming. I know she is exhausted from the case that has kept us up with little sleep and running full force for the past three days. This case hit close to the vest for everyone. It was a triple homicide, a mother and her two children. I kept my wild theories and my smart ass comments to myself knowing this was a rough one. We all assumed the father was guilty and he played a role but it ultimately wasn't his fault.

Beckett had tried to send me home on several occasions. Told me to go spend time with Alexis and the thought was tempting but I could see it written all over her face she needed me by her side and if Kate Beckett needs me there is nowhere else in the world I'd rather be.

I find myself needing to see those gorgeous green eyes, her sleepy smile; I need to hear her voice. Turning to my side without letting go off her fingers I lean up on my elbow and with my other hand I reach over and gently brush the hair from her face. The moon illuminates her already gorgeous features and I know I never want to wake up next to any other women for the rest of my life.

"Kate," I start softly and when she doesn't stir I realize just how out of it she is. But I don't care. I need her.

"Kate, wake up" I say louder placing soft kisses on her eye lids, cheek, neck, and collarbone. She stirs now turning her face towards me and gives my fingers a squeeze but it isn't enough. I need more of her.

"Wake up beautiful," Now I'm kissing her lips and I feel them part for me, morning breathe and all, I kiss her passionately but softly and I hear her let a moan slip out. She starts kissing me back and even though I am pretty sure heaven is kissing Kate I pull away because I have yet to accomplish my mission of seeing her sparkling eyes, earth green with specks of brown, that can make me melt into a pool at her feet with just one look.

The sudden distance between us causes her eyes to flutter open and any panic I may have felt moments ago has subsided. She drops my hand, turns onto her stomach, causing me to lay back and I drape my arm around her and pull her close allowing her head to rest on my chest. Kate's right leg slides up and over my thighs and intertwines our legs together.

"Castle this better not be an attempt for round three because I still haven't recovered," Her tone isn't angry but playful which lets me know that if I tried she wouldn't stop me from devouring her right now and sending her to the lustful state of round three.

The thought causes me to smile and relieve memories of hours before. I place a loving kiss on her forehead and gently squeeze her closer. She tenses and I know she senses something's wrong.

"Rick, are you ok?" She props herself up on my chest so she can look me in the eyes giving me no chance to lie not that I have any reason too.

"I just want to tell you how much I love you."

"Bad dream?" She asks eyeing me suspiciously knowing she isn't the only one who is visited by the horrors we've seen or our nightmares of losing loved ones, mostly each other.

"No I haven't been to sleep yet." She raises an eyebrow and looks past me at the clock on the night stand.

"Talk to me," She looks concerned and it is kind of an odd feeling thinking about us talking about our feelings since once upon a time we use to side step all of our issues. My odd feeling turns to hurt as I think about how foolish I was to once think this wasn't worth it. Of course I know it won't always be rainbows and butterflies with Kate Beckett but it's still unfathomable to think that I ever tried to walk away from her.

"I just like watching you sleep, you always look so peaceful." She rolls her eyes and smiles her famous Kate Beckett smile and I can feel my chest tighten.

"Castle it's no less creepy that you watch me sleep then when you do when I'm awake. And why if you like it so much did you wake me up?"

"I told you because I wanted to tell you how much I love you," Thinking about the long road that got us here and all the time wasted always saddens me but I know every great love story has its share of trials and tribulations. That's what makes it special and the fact that we beat the odds and even made it here with everything we have been through just proves it was fate all along. I was always meant to be with her.

Again, I feel stupid for even second guessing us. For thinking the pain wasn't worth all the pleasure, that through this journey every heart break wasn't actually meant to be heart ache, but was actually pieces of our hearts being exchanged and allowing us to become whole together.

How could I ever take our love for granted and to think this wasn't worth it. I never second guessed her being worth it but sometimes I wanted to throw in the white flag because I started thinking she didn't love me like I love her. Being in love makes men do crazy things, makes us crazy, and makes me sometimes feel like I'm obsessed.

"I love you too now get some beauty sleep you look awful," She smiles again and snuggles closer. When she smiles like that I know there is a hell of a lot worse things I could be obsessed over.

"The time for beauty rest is over my dear detective." I give her a sly smile and a playful grin before I flip her over on her back.

Sleeping still isn't an option. I need to feel her, taste her, breathe her in because I am head over heels in love with her and we have wasted so much time and from here on I am devoted to making up for all the time lost, starting with round three.

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_Read and review pretty please. I am considering ending it here but if it gets good reviews I could definitely take it further and if I do there will of course be more conversation and interaction and it wouldn't just be in Castle's POV. So review and let me know whatcha think! :-)_


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